Finally, everything was packed almost. I was thinking of the first day that I moved in here. I thought I could build a good father-daughter relationship, but I was wrong completely. My mom and sister were right who said that dad was a bad guy. I just wanted to get to know my dad who had no impression of him when I was little.
It's kinda sad that I realized what kind of dad I have. That really hurt me so deep. Family...why my parents destroyed it, why they did that to me. I was just a kid! I won't find out the answer ever. I stopped thinking of it then paid more attention to myself.
( this time I won't ask anything from my family, I can't help that no more.)
How can I be happy? What I wanted? Every time I move out and move in from place to place. Where I really belong? I don't know. Suddenly I can die right away. Sometimes I desire death, maybe.
Life is so hard, and I try to make everything alright. Can I get there? Can I? Can I be happy? Do I have the ability? If someone out there, plz help me, plz support me. I am so sad.
I guess I will be more maturity after moving out. Sometimes I am thinking how maturity I am going to be. I shoulder too much, don¡¦t know if I can take more.
I found some gifts that my friends gave me while I was packing my stuff. That's soooo nice which really touched my heart. I got friends here! Even a few friends didn't connect with me no more. I think friends who still stay in touch with me are real friends.
I cleaned up my mind and ready to go!